PoorAss Hilton
(aka. Paris Hilton's Newest Fashion Accessory)

PerezHilton.com -- Now with 10% real content!

Thursday, June 15, 2006


"Princess Frostylocks & The First Reich's Tour Of Love Continues!"  (view)

Every time you say, "Princess Frostylocks & The First Reich", I die a little bit more inside.

I realize you're gay Perez (which becomes more and more blatantly obvious with every word you speak), and I have no problem with that whatsoever, but not all your readers are gay and I'm sure they're getting sick and tired of having to decipher your bullshit made-up gay names you have for everything. I know I sure am!

I also love how in this article you and your minion Courtney talk as if Lance & Reichen have already completely come out and are boyfriends now. You've gone past the point of speculating, now you're just assuming and acting as if it's true. That's kinda pathetic. I have no real news on this person, so I'll just make shit up.

I think you like to have sex with goats Perez, so from this day forward I'm going to act as if its true.

You should change the banner on your site to read, "Celebrity Assumptions, Not from Concentrate".

     [ by PoorAss Hilton, 6/15/2006   --




37 Comments:

At June 15, 2006 2:47 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

FIRST!

 
At June 15, 2006 2:48 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

I too am getting tired of his made up names. They are just stupid.

 
At June 15, 2006 2:51 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

STUPID AND MORE THAN JUST SLIGHTLY ANNOYING!

SOMEONE NEEDS TO KICK PEREZ IN THE BALLS. ON SECOND THOUGH HE'D PROBABLY LIKE THAT.

 
At June 15, 2006 3:03 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

Perez's site is turning to crap. Moreso that is.

If it's not something positive about Paris it's either something completely stupid or something nobody cares about.

 
At June 15, 2006 3:04 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

In all the time I've been visiting Perez's site I had not once noticed that "Celebrity Juice" thing.

Is it really new?

 
At June 15, 2006 3:25 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

your site sucks. get some new material and uh, in case ya hadnt noticed, everything perez puts on his site, usually ends up either happening or being true, douchebags.

 
At June 15, 2006 4:58 AM, Blogger Patterson said...

Perez reign of fire will come to a bloody end soon at the hands of one too pissed of fags who he is giving a bad name to. Of all his pet names for things and whatoffs this is the one that is so offensive that I totally agree with Poor Ass Hilton to be called henceforth as "PAH" that I as well die a little bit more inside. He thinks that Lance and PR flaks are going to let him come out on a fucking blog! You got to be kidding the backroom negotaions at LPI (Libertation Publications) which is the parent company to Advocate and Out magazines are so in the works it like crazy. Lance and Joey have a big show popping on the airways this fall, as opposed to hiding it, I sure that it will be slightly if not covertly hidden in the show, as a former PR spokeswhore in the the land of weird, I sure that would be the best game game plan, it would a win-win for the Lance, "as having the courage to come forward with who he truly is..." blah, blah, blah to the network which is an amalagation od Paramount and UPN respectly. They will need a "superstar", winner in their lineup, who knows remeber less than 3 years ago, the idea of the Simple Life was a laughing stock joke when Fox presented the idea, now who is laughting, beside Perez and big ass jaw that doubles as a donkey.

As for Lance Bass being gay, beieve me when I say it is not such a big drama deal, lots, and I mean LOTS of flaks in the industry know about it, it was/is his never thing, they never tried to butch him up like they did with JC, it was just Lance the cute but dopey one with the wonky eye. he went to his prom with his best GF for christsakes. My roomate in San Francisco used to date him when he worked at Dinsey and the biys were just starting out, I say the pics of them just chillin and shit, like I said no big deal. Perez will learn from this whole thing that playing against his own kind is wrong andd you only get burnt in the end. Enuff said.

 
At June 15, 2006 5:52 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

ahhhh, it seems the end is nigh for 'pepperez' or is that 'perezlle' or was it 'perezidental!' Let's just call him FAT BOY FAT!

 
At June 15, 2006 7:13 AM, Anonymous Julia (perez supporter) said...

Your site is stupid because you're devoting your time to someone you obviously can't stand which is pointless. You keep pointing out his sexuality, we all know he's gay, so what? Are you a homophobe also? Obsessed with a Gay guy, hmmm that sounds a bit strange. Maybe you're fulfilling your homosexual fantasies yourself. Get over it, everyone enjoys a little hollywood gossip, and you're just jealous Perez is getting the attention you're not.

 
At June 15, 2006 8:16 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

Perez is so self-loathing. If he were happy with himself he wouldn't feel the need to constantly harass Lance like a grade school outcast. I agree with the poster who said that treating his own kind like this will get him in the end. I am almost starting to feel bad for Perez, he had a good thing going but is blowing it on Paris Hilton and crank.

 
At June 15, 2006 9:07 AM, Anonymous Verity said...

Ooooh Julia, another "jealous of Perez" comment.

Be prepared to feel the sharp side of PA's tongue!

I think I was the first to get it - I enjoyed it immensely :)

 
At June 15, 2006 10:06 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

You are just jealous! Leave him alone and find another hobby. If you hate him that much stop reading his blog! Pretty easy don't ya think? I love his site and visit it several times a week which is more than any of your readers can say! Jealousy is sooooo not cool!

 
At June 15, 2006 10:23 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

you have a site dedicated to another site? do you not have anything else better to do? at least Perez is out getting the info and living life. You my friend are just home waiting to live vicariously through him...through a computer? PATHETIC

 
At June 15, 2006 12:22 PM, Anonymous ronny said...

God I love this. All the little Perez supporters and their endless spew of "oh you're jealous ...... blah! blah! blah" horse shit over and over.

Oh how cute. What is it with this little 14 year old Britney loving, Paris admiring little future strippers and their lack of any orginal thought?

Well I guess anyone that loves the likes of the La Hilton sisters (that includes Perez) or Britney "My knee pads made me a star" Spears would have to be brain dead with no taste anyway.

Fight on, bitches.

 
At June 15, 2006 12:34 PM, Anonymous ronny said...

"Anonymous said...
Perez is so self-loathing. If he were happy with himself he wouldn't feel the need to constantly harass Lance like a grade school outcast. I agree with the poster who said that treating his own kind like this will get him in the end"



There are times when I will come to La Perez's defence and when it comes to La Lance Bass I'm 10000% with Perez on that.

First off if we want to talk about "self loathing" lets take a look at La Lance. He's one of the biggest nelly queens next to Elton John, yet Miss Thang won't come out.

So, how is Perez talking shit about one of "his own"?

Lance is straight right? He's got all them girls hanging around him and his "gay friend" Reichen, correct? So he CAN'T be gay!!

This is where "Poor Ass" and I will not agree.

I'm all for La Perez to dish on Lance's sorry ass.

Closets are clothes, not for people.

To honest, I don't know that La Reichen sees in that little twerp in the first place.

La Lance must be one hot slutty bitch in the sack to snag a hunk like Reichen.

 
At June 15, 2006 12:57 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

^ why don't you come out yourself. post ur picture so we can nickname your gay ass.

and poorass hilton sux. ugly vaginas.

 
At June 15, 2006 12:59 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

your blog is boring and hard to get into. starting writing well, with wit and humor, post some pictures, and maybe i could get into it. you have no writing skills. for right now, i am sticking to readin perez's blog.

 
At June 15, 2006 1:24 PM, Anonymous nunya said...

Jump off a cliff! Should we play in the freeway too?

Perez asks for things like this. I've always thought he enjoys the commenters that talk smack about him. Any attention is good attention.

And am I the only one that suspects there's only really about 20 posters over there that post 4000 times each?

 
At June 15, 2006 3:05 PM, Blogger PoorAss Hilton said...

"You are just jealous! Leave him alone and find another hobby. If you hate him that much stop reading his blog! Pretty easy don't ya think?"

You're right, it would be easy to stop reading his blog, but then how am I supposed to rag on him and his stupid antics?

Do you think I'm the only one that feels this way? NO! Even long time readers of Perez's think his site has turned to crap, so, I made a site to cater to them. Deal with it.

"stop reading his blog! Pretty easy don't ya think?"

Ummm, now this is just amusing. You could easily have never come to this site, but no, you found the need to come defend your little Perez. It's called speaking your mind, and I don't care if you do it, so leave me the hell alone for doing it myself.

Maybe you should listen to your own advice.

 
At June 15, 2006 3:09 PM, Blogger PoorAss Hilton said...

"you have a site dedicated to another site? do you not have anything else better to do?"

Nope! My sole purpose in life is to annoy the fuck out of you!

"You my friend are just home waiting to live vicariously through him...through a computer? PATHETIC"

Yes, because all I do is sit around my house waiting for Perez to say something stupid.

I find it funny that everyone thinks this blog is all I do and that I don't have a life. As I've stated many times before, I'm very lazy when it comes to this blog and it takes very little time to update (but has been bringing me sooo much joy lately, listening to so many losers defend the queen of all losers).

That's the beautiful thing about being retired. If I wanted to sit here for an entire weeks straight ragging on Perez, I could do that! I do, however, have a life, contrary to what everyone seems to think.

 
At June 15, 2006 3:14 PM, Blogger PoorAss Hilton said...

"God I love this. All the little Perez supporters and their endless spew of "oh you're jealous ...... blah! blah! blah" horse shit over and over."

I'm actually tempted to make a post to the main part of the site explaining why I'm not jealous of Perez. I've said it many times in these comments, but of course people don't always see them and they keep showing up to say that I'm jealous.

It's very amusing. I have zero reason to be jealous of Perez. ZERO. Oh, wait.... no, absolutely zero.

 
At June 15, 2006 3:18 PM, Blogger PoorAss Hilton said...

"There are times when I will come to La Perez's defence and when it comes to La Lance Bass I'm 10000% with Perez on that."

Oh don't get me wrong, I wouldn't doubt one bit if Lance was gay. When I first saw a post on Perez's site talking about him being gay I thought, "Ahhh, that would explain a lot of things".

However, I don't go around assuming he's gay and treating it like a fact.

What if it turns out that he's not? What if there's some totally logical explanation for why those two are together so much lately? If it were you, would you be happy with the shit Perez has been posting? I think not.

 
At June 15, 2006 3:27 PM, Blogger PoorAss Hilton said...

"and poorass hilton sux. ugly vaginas."

I believe that's much better then being Perez and sucking ugly cocks.

To each his own I guess.

 
At June 15, 2006 3:30 PM, Blogger PoorAss Hilton said...

"your blog is boring and hard to get into. starting writing well, with wit and humor, post some pictures, and maybe i could get into it. you have no writing skills. for right now, i am sticking to readin perez's blog."

I can form complete sentences and I don't have to make up idiotic words for people and things just because I can't remember the real spelling.

As far as I'm concerned, I'm far and above Perez... I mean Perezzle... I mean Perezito. Well, whatever lame name he has for himself today, he still sucks.

 
At June 15, 2006 3:34 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

What if it turns out that he's not?

Perez runs a gossip site. G-O-S-S-I-P. you know that thing your moma told you not to partake in cause it was wrong? now i wonder why you visit his site at all.

i'm just going to throw around a theory for you here : what if your problem with perez's speculating over lance's sexuality is a reflection of your own fears around the subject?

if perez printed "lance is dating this hot hollywood chick", would you say he's assuming lance is straight? nope, because it's the norm to assume everyone is straight in america. perez just choses to assume every guy he likes is gay.

he's just as fucked up as you are.

 
At June 15, 2006 3:39 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

I love how just a couple days ago, there were no comments, and now that somebody has posted this site on PerezHilton.com, everyone is coming to bash! (Or defend, for some incoherent reason.) Perez is fugly, and this site is hilarious. I hate that guy! I only go to read the comments on how ugly and annoying he is.

 
At June 15, 2006 3:45 PM, Blogger PoorAss Hilton said...

"Perez asks for things like this. I've always thought he enjoys the commenters that talk smack about him. Any attention is good attention."

EXACTLY! There's no such thing as bad publicity (although I'm not sure if this site could be considered publicity, hehe).

The majority of the comments on his site are ones bashing him, yet he doesn't moderate the comments, he just lets people keep speaking their mind.

"And am I the only one that suspects there's only really about 20 posters over there that post 4000 times each?"

Well I can assure you that he does get quite a bit of traffic. The spilloff I'm getting to this site alone is quite impressive, hehe. But sometimes it does seem like the same person posting a lot of the stuff on there (and other commenters on his site have thought this as well).

 
At June 15, 2006 3:50 PM, Blogger PoorAss Hilton said...

"Perez runs a gossip site. G-O-S-S-I-P. you know that thing your moma told you not to partake in cause it was wrong? now i wonder why you visit his site at all."

Really?! That's what gossip is?! GOOD LORD I'VE SEEN THE LIGHT!

Of course I know what gossip is, but do we really have to hear the same shit about Lance every couple fuckin' days? It's not like there's ever any new information, it's always the same shit telling him to come out of the closet with some gay-ass Perez words photoshopped onto it. Gossip or not, it's the same shit over and over.

I wouldn't complain if he actually had some new gossip to add whenever he posts about Lance, but he doesn't.

 
At June 15, 2006 3:54 PM, Blogger PoorAss Hilton said...

"I love how just a couple days ago, there were no comments, and now that somebody has posted this site on PerezHilton.com, everyone is coming to bash!"

Bingo! That's one of the main reasons this site was started in the first place.

I noticed that the majority of the comments on PH.com were bashing Perez, so I figured I've give them all a place to come and bash together :) Like one big happy family.

And for the record, there were no comments on this site a few days ago because it didn't exist a few days ago, hehe.

"Perez is fugly, and this site is hilarious."

Thanks! :) But I can't wait to see how many Perez lovers show up and say that I wrote that. You know, because nobody could ever really like this site and dislike Perez... it just can't be.

 
At June 15, 2006 4:07 PM, Blogger PoorAss Hilton said...

"Your site is stupid because you're devoting your time to someone you obviously can't stand which is pointless."

It's not pointless. It's a release for everyone out there that's getting fed up with Perez's bullshit.


"You keep pointing out his sexuality, we all know he's gay, so what? Are you a homophobe also? Obsessed with a Gay guy, hmmm that sounds a bit strange."

If you don't think I'd be making fun of him if he were straight, you're completely wrong.

I live in Vancouver, BC, so I've been cool with homosexuals for yeeeears at this point. You can't live in this city and be closeminded. I have many gay friends, and although some of them have tried to convert me, I just don't swing that way. But I have absolutely no problem with it whatsoever.

Just a side note, am I the only one that thinks "homosexual" sounds more offensive then "gay"? It sounds like some clinical term, as if it's a medical condition or something.

 
At June 15, 2006 4:34 PM, Blogger PoorAss Hilton said...

Verity

"Be prepared to feel the sharp side of PA's tongue!"

Naw, I've given up on trying to respond to everyone that says I'm just jealous of Perez. The entire notion is just laughable, and it's getting quite boring.

 
At June 15, 2006 4:48 PM, Anonymous ronny said...

FYI - As a gay man, I hate the word "homosexual". It's like "negro" is to black people.

 
At June 15, 2006 4:53 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

was my post deleted, i can't find it.

 
At June 15, 2006 5:02 PM, Blogger PoorAss Hilton said...

"FYI - As a gay man, I hate the word "homosexual""

Well thank you, I'm glad I'm not the only one that feels this way. Means extra coming from someone that's gay too.

 
At June 15, 2006 5:03 PM, Blogger PoorAss Hilton said...

"was my post deleted, i can't find it."

Was it on a different post perhaps?

Unless it's someone posting the exact same thing a million times in a bunch of different articles so that they force everyone to see their comments, I haven't deleted anything from here.

 
At June 15, 2006 6:52 PM, Blogger PoorAss Hilton said...

"I love his site and visit it several times a week which is more than any of your readers can say!"

Well no shit, this site's only been up for 3 frickin' days.

Thanks for the update though Sherlock.

 
At June 17, 2006 6:35 PM, Blogger Anouka said...

I'll admit, 'princess frostylocks and the first reich' are the best gloss that site has come up with. I laugh every time I see it. I know the contents of the post are going to be shit, but I really really really love those tags for each of them together.

or maybe i'm just a moron. but fuck it: seeing a 'princess frostylocks and the first reich' post does something good for my day, though.

 

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