PoorAss Hilton
(aka. Paris Hilton's Newest Fashion Accessory)

PerezHilton.com -- Now with 10% real content!

Saturday, June 17, 2006

A taste of the REAL Perez  

Tonight I decided to do a bit of sleuthing for information on our friend Perez (aka. Maria, I mean Mario Lavandeira), and let me tell you, it didn't take long to find some interesting stuff on the guy.

Although these articles might not be news to some of you, I figured I'd still post them just in case some of you are out of the loop on Perez's dickhead antics over the past year (as I was not all that long ago).

If you have any other articles like this on Perez, just post a comment with the link!

  1. Even though Gawker.com is a blog itself (a popular blog for daily news and gossip in Manhattan), after seeing what a cocky dickwad Perez Hilton is, they said this:

    "Today, though, we realized that we’re wrong. Bloggers, in fact, are scum."

    And remember, they run a blog.

    The information that drew them to this conclusion was a set of emails between Perez and Jose Martinez, a publicist at Harrison & Shriftman (which handles PR for Playboy’s parties), where Perez acted as if he was god.

    See what Perez is really like by clicking on the below link.

    "Perez Hilton Makes Us Hate Ourselves" - Gawker.com
    View this article >>>

    And thanks to nunya for this link, which was posted on Gawker's site a week or so after the above one. It's chalked with, well, what'd you'd expect to see on Perez's online gay sex profile. Perez himself even took time out of his busy schedule to leave a comment on the site.

    "The Secret Life of Perez Hilton" - Gawker.com
    View this article >>>
    Click here to go straight to the profile screenshot >>>

    And then of course that article led us to this more recent online profile of Perez's. My favorite quote has to be:

    "I love to work, be healthy and fit. Turn my body out! HA HA HA."

    Click here to view his profile >>>

  2. It was over a year ago, but even back then Perez was begging for money so he could keep his site running. But that's not the real story here, check out the comments. There are people out there that know what a scumbag Perez really is. In fact, I don't even want to make you wait, so here's a snippet of what you'll find:

    "He got run out of L.A. because he is a meth addict and a thief. The boy had the gumption to steal a check from a friend's apartment and then deposit it into his own account as a third-party check. Like his ass wouldn't get caught."

    "Save Perez Hilton!" - SocialiteLife.com
    View this article >>>

  3. Instead of commenting on this one, I'll just give you a clip from it:

    "He’s repugnant, phony, and petty — and those are his most redeeming qualities. Indeed, he is to gossip blogs what Matt Drudge is to political ones: a vainglorious, self-absorbed twit, who substitutes his own brand of obvious wordplay and “OMIGOD He’s soooo gay!” musings for the observational wit and tawdry intelligence of bloggers like the folks at Gawker Media and Idontlikeyouinthatway."

    "The (Nauseating) World According to Perez" - Pajiba.com
    View this article >>>

  4. As an FYI, his stupid idiotic spellings that he does online, I guess it carries over from the real world. Check out the first clip on this page.

    Perez, what's does "ticture paken" mean? :P

    View the clip >>>

  5. This one's more for curiosity sake then anything...

    Does anyone know what the hell PerezHilton.org is all about?!? I found it in my travels, and I was wondering if anyone could shed some light on the subject.

    Go to PerezHilton.org >>>

  6. And last but not least, here's the petition to ban Perez from the Internet. I couldn't leave this one out :)

    View or Sign the petition >>>

There! So now for all the people that have said I'm lazy and haven't done any real research for this site, shut it! haha

Oh, and enjoy the links :)

     [ by PoorAss Hilton, 6/17/2006   --


At June 17, 2006 2:35 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said...



At June 17, 2006 2:40 AM, Blogger LD said...

nice article!

At June 17, 2006 2:41 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

omg!!! i cant' believe the shit he said in that first article!

does he think he's untouchable???

At June 17, 2006 2:42 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

gossip on the gossiper, that's awesome!

At June 17, 2006 2:48 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

I think I'm going to wet myself!

Good job PoorAss! I hadn't seen any of this stuff before.

At June 17, 2006 3:00 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said...


At June 17, 2006 3:03 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

Mario totally suits that faggy little bitch

At June 17, 2006 3:10 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

Is it just me or does perezhilton.org seem like the place where perez's whores post gossip for him to sift through and post on his site?

At June 17, 2006 3:30 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

This stuff is priceless!

Too bad you have to open an account before you can sign the petition though.

At June 17, 2006 4:10 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said...


At June 17, 2006 5:15 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

hahaa ticture paken!
he has the most annoying voice ever

At June 17, 2006 7:24 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

i thought u didn't want to spend that much "time" on this blog?

u starting to enjoy the attention, dont u?

At June 17, 2006 8:33 AM, Blogger Ronny said...

Thanks for the dirt! This is better than talking shit about La Cruise.

I'll be out of the loop for a few days, we're going to Las Vegas with the parental units.

Have fun! I'll check back in when I get home.

At June 17, 2006 10:16 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

i still can't believe perez said some of that stuff :( the emails with that pr guy were just harsh

i actually came here to tell you what a loser you were for starting this site but now i am just now sure what to think. maybe you're on to something here.

At June 17, 2006 10:21 AM, Anonymous gen said...

Well giddy up, Poorass! Nice work!

At June 17, 2006 11:27 AM, Anonymous Tonya said...

Oh yeah, for those of you who hadn't seen this stuff before, you can go to fadedyouth.blogspot.com

This guy HATES Perez and has some pretty nice pics and articles about him in the archives. I am sure you can do a search for Perez on his site and read til your heart's content.

Not trying to plug his site or anything but he really does have some good reading on our dear fatty Perez.

At June 17, 2006 12:36 PM, Blogger Brandon said...






At June 17, 2006 2:13 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

He's also been a bankrupt too.

Wait for Paris to dump him and it's going to be alllllll ovah.

At June 17, 2006 5:54 PM, Anonymous nunya said...

That Gawker article was nothing compared to the one they posted a week or so later. This one http://www.gawker.com/news/perez-hilton/the-secret-life-of-perez-hilton-161328.php was pretty wild.
Perez even posted in the comments section for that one.

At June 17, 2006 6:22 PM, Anonymous Verity said...

Oh look at Perez when he was all young and skinny :)

I wanna see what PA looks like ;)


At June 17, 2006 6:30 PM, Anonymous nunya said...

Me too, V!

At June 17, 2006 6:36 PM, Anonymous Verity said...

Me too, V!

Hehehe - come on the PA, you're in demand! ;)

I just watched the "ticture paken" clip, that cracked me up. Bless him and his backwards English :)

And I think perezhilton.org is some random blogger that just has no imagination. Perez's website isn't even in the gossip links! The cheek...

At June 17, 2006 7:25 PM, Blogger PoorAss Hilton said...


No worries about posting that like, it's an awesome site! Was checking it out a bit this afternoon before I had to head out.

The only links I'm going to delete on here are ones that are just blatant advertising.

At June 17, 2006 7:35 PM, Anonymous *tara said...

hahaha...a meth addict, huh? quite something for someone who continually rags on pete doherty and posts pictures with his "oh-so-talented" paint program added cocaine "boogers". nice. what a fucktard.

At June 17, 2006 7:38 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

Man o Man You Sooo Peppered!!!

Barf! You made my day! AGAIN!!!


At June 17, 2006 7:53 PM, Blogger PoorAss Hilton said...


"I wanna see what PA looks like ;)"

LOL! Sorry, it's not gonna happen. Ever! hehe

There's really no point anyways, nobody would know who I am, and it wouldn't change anything. I'm insignificant, hehe.

At June 17, 2006 11:25 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

this shit is PRICELESS!

keep up the good work poorass!

At June 18, 2006 12:25 AM, Blogger PoorAss Hilton said...


Thanks for that link! I added it to the list right below the other Gawker link.

At June 18, 2006 9:27 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

This guy I know actually hired Perez to do some PR work for his company (I can't say what type of company because it will become very obvious)....I'll have to ask him if he has any dirt and I'll post it here if I find out any.

At June 18, 2006 1:02 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

So he has HIV?

At June 18, 2006 1:20 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...


I'm retarded.

At June 18, 2006 5:35 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

The meth and the stealing of the check rumour is golden!


At June 20, 2006 2:56 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

haha! lavandeira means washlady or the person who washes your clothes......maybe he should just go do that instead

At June 20, 2006 3:46 AM, Blogger PoorAss Hilton said...

"haha! lavandeira means washlady or the person who washes your clothes......maybe he should just go do that instead"

He tried. He was underqualified.

At June 20, 2006 6:33 AM, Anonymous Grounded said...

Thank God for this Blog!!!!! I hate hate Perez!! Please keep this site up and expose the truth that is obvious to all, Perez is a tweeker star kiss ass. BTW I actually hear he likes to bareback! Thats why he hates Clay Gaiken soo much, He sees a lot of himself in Clay. Oh and my spy tells me Perez is a bottom. Keep commenting on Perez's site, thats how I found this site!!

At June 20, 2006 9:22 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

I love this:

Latina/Latino, White/European
I am Latino yet White. 100 % Cuban.

Is he really that stupid? You can't be white/European and 100% Cuban at the same time. I swear he was dropped on his head one too many times as a baby.

At June 23, 2006 6:37 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

I am gobsmacked that someone would dedicate a site to this. It's very sad that you take Perez Hilton so seriously, who else does? He's a gossip columist for god's sake. You are a waste of time. Sad.

At June 23, 2006 8:46 AM, Blogger PoorAss Hilton said...


"It's very sad that you take Perez Hilton so seriously"

I really don't take him that seriously. He is, after all, a joke.

"He's a gossip columist for god's sake"

No no, he's a biased gossip columnist that won't post anything negative about his "friends".

"You are a waste of time."

You're right, I am. Now get the fuck off my site bitch!

At June 23, 2006 12:07 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

To the creator of this site, about the post which stated that Perez is a thief and ect. People make mistakes and he made a mistake. Why still rag on him? Unless he is still a stealing meth addict. His site is for entertainment purposes. This is what he enjoys doing; and people enjoy reading it. If you dont, then dont log on. Are you one of his exs?


At June 23, 2006 2:15 PM, Blogger PoorAss Hilton said...

"His site is for entertainment purposes."

As is this one.

"people enjoy reading it. If you dont, then dont log on."

Take your own advice.

"Are you one of his exs?"

Oh yeah! He plowed me good!

At June 23, 2006 3:17 PM, Blogger PoorAss Hilton said...

"Perez is a thief and ect. People make mistakes and he made a mistake. Why still rag on him?"

Right, I guess I should be nice to the guy now that he's gotten help... much like he was 'nice' to Brandon Davis after he decided to go to rehab.

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